There is only one vehicle that transports ice cream and other frozen snacks around town: The Ding Dong Cart.

Yeah right buddy. No one “rough talks” Bigfoot and lives. You my friend are drunk off that moonshine.

“I know it is fun to wrestle. A nice piledrive to the face... or a punch to the face... but you cannot do it. Because, it is in the Bible not to wrestle your neighbour.”

A few nights ago my homeboy Cookie Monster and I got drunk out of our minds on cookies and went on Chatroulette. We took some pictures of our new friends. Enjoy.

Oh and P.S. NSFW!

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The Nike commercials with the Lebron and Kobe puppets have been a favorite of mine since last year, but 'What Up Gangstars' featuring Jay Louis is my new favorite shit:





Now if I could only get Wonder Showzen to make a comeback.

Dear Santa, It's me again. Hook me up this X-Mas.

I Love you. xoxo

- Emeyesi

I'm not sure this latest video from Gavin McInnes, father of Sophie, actually answers the question it poses but regardless, I have been laughing my man balls off at it.

WARNING: It is the most NSFW I've seen not on or from a porn site. So do us all a favor and try not to get fired today.

Also, from one of the commenters on the video page: 2k10aint. Ha!!

Dear Santa, Bring me a new one.

xoxo

- Emeyesi

Bike theft. That was something I feared ever since I got my Mongoose Expert back in ‘85. If I wasn’t on it I had it chained up and locked. TWO TIMES! Granted they were those crazy cheap combination joints wrapped in plastic, but whatever. They got the job done. Due to my paranoia I never had a bike stolen. Everyone else I knew wasn't so lucky. So I dedicate this video to them. DON'T STEAL BIKES BRO!

As someone who has always had some clean sneakers I‘ve experienced my share of the “Those are some nice clean sneakers. What would you do if I stepped on them?” game. I usually respond with something like “Do you want to get punched in the face?” or “Step on them and see what happens.” I’ve never had to sock anyone in the eye (yet) because I attended the Buggin' Out school of restraint.



Folks are lucky that I'm a “righteous black man.”

This is my friend Sara's dog. His name is Bernard. He got excited when I rubbed his belly.



I occasionally have to assist my family with their computer problems by remotely logging into their computers and tinkering around. I just had to set this picture as my brothers desktop picture. When he and my dad visited me last summer, Bernard was all up in my brothers business.

mitchell: dude i pissed my self when that popped up
me: i thought you might like that. bernard misses his bitch
mitchell: is that bernard?
me: told me to take that and send it to you

Thanks Duffy for letting us know we all need to think before we speak.

Something is missing though. Like the ad needs to end with the "The More You Know" rainbow star. WHAT? Rainbows aren't gay, they are bright and happy!

A friend of mine hates when people use the word "retarded" to describe something stupid, they need those ads next.

My recommendation, download a thesaurus application on your iphone, ya dummy.

"For your health!"

No, I don't live in GA. But I'm sure people further south of me are feeling the effects of the slowing economy too. In order to stay afloat my principal had to cut everyone's salaries by 20%. On the plus side we also take one day off per week. I'm essentially making the same salary still but that extra income from that 20% reduction is definitely noticeable when I get my pay check. Iron Giant and I are pretty organized with our income and we've devised a system that allows us to save even with my salary cut. But being a home owner and pet owner make living on reduced pay very stressful.

Our houses utilities are fairly dated and could, at any point, fail and put us into a tremendous amount of debt. Plus our dog Scully could get into something she shouldn't and require medical assistance at any point too.

In order to stay on top of things financially, Iron Giant and I have gone into what we call "Super-Savings Mode" and it's pretty self-explanatory as the title suggests. Below are just a few of the things we've done in order to keep a handle on our financial situation. Like I said, a lot of it is pretty obvious but in case any of you are worried about your income and can't focus on how to make ends meet for today, then I hope you find this helpful.

1) When we looked at our bills, our biggest expense was eating at restaurants instead of cooking at home. On average we'd spend 28 dollars per meal about 3-4 times a week which ends up being a huge chunk of change at the end of the month. Being disciplined with our food budget allows us to really cut down on that money. On average our weekly food expenses have now been 50-80 dollars for two people and a 30 lb. dog. The 30 dollar difference is due to when we plan to make a lot of meals that depend on produce and pricier proteins like fish, which by the way are good to stock up on when they're frozen and on sale. Our grocery store is pretty dependable when it comes to frozen talapia fillets for a decent price.
If fish isn't your game then canned beans is another option. Even when money was good for Iron Giant and I we still enjoyed black beans and rice as a meal. So invest in some cookbooks and try cooking at home more. If you're not comfortable in the kitchen then I suggest youtubing some Good Eats episodes.

2) Electricity was the second largest expense for our house. Granted, there's still a lot of debate over the health and environmental impacts of compact fluorescent bulbs but you'd be hard pressed to find an incandescent bulb in our house. They're still a little difficult to get used to since they put out a different color light than the typical incandescent bulb but considering that incandescent bulbs give off 90% heat and 10% light, the energy saving fluorescent bulb is hard to pass up. In North Carolina, most homes use a device called a Heat Pump in order to heat and cool their house. Basically it's a large sprawling air conditioner that cools in the summer and operates in reverse during the winter to warm the house. I won't get into the details but Most Heat pumps are fueled by electricity which can be pretty costly. Luckily Iron Giant and I still have our Massachusetts sweaters and so we've opted to cut down the heat and put on an extra layer. It shaves off quite a bit of the utility bill especially in tandem with the fluorescent bulbs.

3) Iron Giant and I find entertainment a necessity in our lives, luckily we can still afford it in some fashion. We've reduced our cable package to basic basic for 13 dollars a month. We'll probably keep this until this season of Lost is over. We also have Netflix which we'll try and keep but will let it go if money gets real tight. The ultimate saving solution is to have no television at all but then what will I do when I'm unemployed? The practical move is to invest in a digital antenna and a converter box. I purchased some back in June of 08 and was very satisfied until I moved the television to a new room and lost my reception, thus the reason I have cable. Overall though, the setup was super simple and the over-the-air HD was amazingly good, which I'm told is because it's not compressed like cable HD.

So there are a few suggestions to at least point you towards some money saving/budget restructuring techniques. Oh, if you DON'T have a budget then definitely make one. There are lots of good online resources to help you assemble even a simple pen and paper monthly budget. Believe me it's worth it. Good luck.

Here's some more random shit I used to listen to.

Bell Biv DeVoe's "Poison," from 1990.



Turk knows whats up.

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